Ruby Sky
Can someone please feedback for my poem?
It's a free verse poem.
THE SUN
The brilliant sun is setting
On the horizon.
What a marvelous sight;
It’s a ruby
In the blood-red sky.
And it melts my heart
To see
The evermore beauty.
I'm a grade 6 so please dont expect much.
Please give me some feedbacks!
TH
Also, please look for any puncutation mistakes!
Not bad, not bad. I don't think evermore is used in the right context here; try "everlasting" or "eternal." I was a little disappointed because you had a great beginning but it ended too quickly! Could you make it a little longer? Good work.
As a footnote, it doesn't matter how old you are. Don't let that restrict your creativity.
Kaskade Intro @ Ruby Skye 11/20/09
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